My Body, My Confidence

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Have you ever been mocked or you heard comments about your body shape, weight, size or a specific body part? A lot of people derive pleasure in humiliating or making critical comments about other persons appearance and the way they look. This may, sometimes, come off as a joke but it is annoying and irritating. This action or practice is termed BODY SHAMING and it instills self-doubt into the person affected.

Growing up, I always wished to be tall because I admire tall and curvy ladies a whole lot. Fortunately for me, God did me well and I ended up being petite.

As a result of my height, I got a lot of disapproval from friends and people around me. Sometimes I got comments like, “you are so small”, “when God was giving height to people, where went you?” and so many other remarks. These comments got to me; I allowed them have an effect on me. I felt intimidated whenever I was with tall people. As a matter of fact, taking pictures with my tall friends became an issue for me.

I became so tired of being short and wanted to grow, even if its a little added height. I cried and begged God. I looked at myself in the mirror and believed people’s negative comments to me. I dwelt on my insecurities and was beginning to lose myself. I forgot about my beautiful attributes and values.

A certain day came and I said to myself: “This is who I am and there is nothing I can do about it. I am short and so what? I am beautiful and wonderfully made. My height does not define me nor my worth”. I began to confess positive things into my life and began to see my inner beauty and not my physical appearance.

Now here is the catch: hearing negative comments or criticism about your appearance are inevitable. These criticisms come from friends, family, people around us and even you. A lot of people do not feel comfortable in their own body and so, they criticize their appearance through comparison to another person.

This is as a result of them having a vision of what they want to look like. Some people feel they are too short, too tall, too skinny, too fat or too many other things and want to be taller, thinner, fit, short, or a particular body shape. They pick on flaws that are irrelevant and create unrealistic expectations.

Nobody is immune to societal pressures; pressure to look in a certain way and have a certain appearance but irrespective of that, comments about your body or your appearance or how you look are unnecessary in any context. In whatever form these comments come – either done by yourself or others – they have a way of making you feel anxious, depressed, embarrassed and self-conscious. It can result in low self esteem and lack of ability in maximizing your full potential. Engaging in social activities also becomes a problem for the fear of being judged.

In order for you to be able to manage these critical comments and achieve body acceptance, you must first practice self-love. Having self-compassion and loving everything about yourself. Embrace and accept your perceived appearance flaw and learn to accept your insecurities and imperfections.

A lot of people live in denial rather than come to terms with the fact that it is what it is and it wont change. Why worry about the things you cannot change about yourself? Rather than dwelling on insecurities, focus on the things you like about yourself and improve on them. Strife to be a better version of yourself; the world waits to see you. One thing is sure, you cannot control what others say to you, but you have the power to focus on your positive aspects.

Always confess positive things. When next you look in the mirror, instead of dwelling on negative words like: “I am ugly”, “why can’t I be like this?” replace them with: “I am beautiful”, “I am made in the image of Christ”, “I am not worthless” and other beautiful words. Your physical appearance does not define you. Your body is just like a house accommodating the real you. Your value is much more important than your appearance.

When next someone makes a comment about your looks and it is perceived as body shaming, make them understand that you are comfortable in your own skin and body.

Genesis 1:27 says: So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them (KJV).

Remember you are made in the image of God and after his likeness. You are an exact replica of God. God is petite, thin, firm, dark, fair, and tall and many more things you can think of. Look at yourself in the mirror and see the image of God through you.

You can help someone today by setting an example and stand up for those that are still living in self-doubt and those that are body shamed.